Happy new year to you all.
I've been wanting to update my webpage for some
time. It's been one thing after another for the last month or so.
No time to do the things I want to do.
Well tough titty, it's me-time now; no more chores.
Extending Little Carol's Birthday Week concept,
I'm having Birthday Month, a big holiday. Might be more of a horror-day
than holiday. 3 weeks for 3 decades. Visiting Singapore, Perth,
Melbourne, and Sydney. Hoping to catch up with as many of you as
possible in Jan/Feb.
Six months ago, I joined the gym in an effort to
get fit for my pending birthday. It's the big one. Dirty thirty.
Fffffffffffar out Brussel sprout. Can't believe thirty is a matter of
weeks away. My goal was to put on some weight so I might look my age
at last. Am sick of being asked for ID when buying
booze. Well I've actually lost weight. No Heathrow Injection for
this legend. For the first time in a decade, I'm back to 56Kg with a
27in waist. Not exactly helping the "look older" cause though I am well
fit. So, it was time for some Musashi protein supplement powder.
Recent Legendary picture (look Petra I'm
smiling ...sort of).
I think my face is changing shape around the chin and jaw line ...is it?
Flammable Christmas pudding
Me join a gym? Obviously, hell has frozen over, innit.
...AND training every evening - innit though. The main drawcard was yoga
classes which I'd been missing terribly. Sivananda yoga is a bit
different from Iyenga. We do lots of sun salutations, followed by
shoulder stand, fish, bridge, wheel, dolphin, headstand, and crow etc.
The class is quite mixed and I'm one of the strongest. We did peacock
once and I was the only one who could do it.
Before Christmas, I deigned to explore Camden Markets
for some presents. Not one of my better ideas. Extremely overcrowded.
Full of randoms. Stuck out like dogs bollocks. Felt very uncomfortable.
Not my bag, obviously.
New year, new job ....for Rod at least. He's now
CEO and has upgraded himself from Mr Perfect to Sir Perfect. A well
earned title indeed. It will get up Greg's goat - so I can go along with
it. Others are yet to concur. When Tessa set the table for Christmas, we
all had name cards and my spot was correctly labelled as "The Legend"
but, sadly, there was no acknowledgement of Rod's perfection.
Christmas with the Fitz Massive was well good.
I spent a couple of days at Sunnymead (Rod and Tessa's joint).
Gaggy and the Eves were there too. We all got a bit squiffy on
Bucks Fizz champers and played a
range of family games. We changed teams regularly so I wouldn't
always be on the winning team ...shit out of luck, it didn't
work. I guess there's no substitute for legendhood.
Rod, Tessa, Jamie and I attended the C of E
Christmas service in the the posh village of Oxshott. Everyone
was dressed up ...except us. The C of E service was longer than
a Catholic one. I was surprised at the overlap in prayers
especially the line in the creed "one catholic and apostolic church". Roxy wanted to come but was unwell. Henry was asleep.
Oh and we didn't have to wait until 9pm
for lunch while I wrapped Greg's presents and Greg wrote essays
on sticky notes for gift tags ...as happened two years ago.
Can't wait to see Greg and the gang in a couple of weeks. Fadz
gave me the inside scoop on Greg's Christmas party ...not as
good as Rod's obviously.
"We wish you a merry Christmas" from Sunnymead
13 Southwark Bridge Road - where This Life was filmed in the
My favourite drama ever.
Rod has some incriminating footage of me
sweeping up some Domino Specials (dog turds) ...so Greg was
there in spirit, being the biggest turd of all.
Had a second Christmas with Hazel's Massive.
Michelle and John's new joint in East Grinstead is huge. It's
like a kindergarten with toys everywhere. Kerry and Keith gave
Hazel and Tony's girls some fancy underwear; Dani was well
embarrassed. Of course, somebody didn't need any encouragement
to crack jokes about botty floss. Poor Keith and the boys were
delegated with the responsibility of buying them. The boys
aren't allowed to watch Torchwood after they accidentally saw
the couple going for it hammer and tong.
Apparently, Kerry's dog is a leso - he
munches carpet. Chrissie has a Jack Russell puppy which she
dresses in clothes. Naff. Tracy's cat is still going strong.
Can't wait to see my cat again.
There were lots of special festive
episodes of my favourite programmes on TV:
Workwise, am still at Sodexho. Longest job so
far, Nudging 6 months. We've all lost count of the number of
desks we've had. At last count, Dick and Dec had moved least (or
should that be Deck and Dic in Kiwi pronunciation??). The temps
gang decorated our workstations for Christmas. Fatz hung up some
beads that looked like a set of "burra jhola" and some balls
above her head that we kept expecting to drop (yes, lots of
jokes about "Have your balls dropped yet?" and "I've got balls"
...which Pav would appreciate).
- Vicar of Dibley (last ever episode) - Dawn
French at her hilarious best.
- This Life 10 year reunion - a bit
disappointing. Nothing about their (mis)adventures over the
last 10 years; only where they are now. Anna is still my
- Little Britain Abroad - more of the
- Dr Who - Catherine Tate as the runaway
bride. Nothing special.
Me, Fatz, Dick, and Nicole sit here (in that order).
Quiet Nathalie has to endure all our noise.
Me at Buck House, on way to meeting Lawrence and Grace
...whom I'll be seeing again in a couple of weeks.
Our group of temps is endangered. Nicole
is off to America this week; Dec's finishing next week; I'm off
to Aussie the week after; so that leaves Dick and Fatz. We're
being replaced by new perms, including Gary. Fatz has caught Gaz
unashamedly gawking at her tits and arse. She has a special song
for him from the Renault Clio ad: "I see you baby, checking that
arrrrrse". And whenever Laura walks past, Fatz sings The
Scissors Sisters' "Laura". This phenomena has a special name:
Fatima FM. Fatz is titillated with Richard's cheeks and my
customary response is "Which ones?" I'm going to miss our little gang.
It's official. Marty is/has a Silly Little
Knob ...of the Mercedes SLK variety. He's too paranoid to drive
it to work so he bought Jax a Holden Barina (Opel Corsa) which
she will never touch. A director driving an automatic 3-door
Barina seems rather pedestrian to me. Rod has the right idea
with his black Celica.
Until next time, it's tu tar from me.
11 January, 2007